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1. What is your name?
Grebok, what’s yours?
2. What is your favorite color?
So you’re just going to bowl right past my questions? I see how you are, quiz.
3. What is your favorite time of the year?
I’m not sure why I should have to answer your questions if you’re just going to ignore mine. But Spring. I like Spring. Birds, flowers, babies and crap. But not baby crap.
4. What is your favorite animal?
The ridge-backed Bruntlak.
5. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Bruntlak-ball.
6. What is your favorite smell?
I’m starting to really like the smell of oil… because it’s manly.
7. Do you like your handwriting?
Did my calligraphy teacher send you? Tell her you never saw me.
8. First thing you wash in the shower?
I don’t understand the question.
9. Do you plan outfits?
They used to be planned for me, but not anymore. Now I just wear whatever. Freedom. I wear freedom.
10. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Yes. A hundred times yes. Chuckles isn’t going to see this, is he?
11. What’s the closest thing to you that’s red?
The crusted blood under Chuckles’ nose over there.
12. What’s the last dream you remember having?
I… there was this bird, such a pretty bird, in a cage. A cage made of iron—that was also my college dorm, if that makes sense? My—the bird’s roommates were a hermit crab and a toaster oven. And all these nobles in fancy dress kept walking past the cage and asking where the toaster oven’s parents were. The bird kept singing and trying to get their attention but they only wanted to talk to the toaster oven. Then the hermit crab wasn’t there and we all just sort of understood he had died of a heroin overdose over winter break. Then my alarm went off. Why? What do you think that means?
13. What are you craving right now?
Ham. Do you have any?
14. Do you like your hair?
So that’s a no on the ham?
15. Is there anything sparkly in the room you’re in?
Oh man, you have no idea. It’s like a swarm of pixie strippers lost a fight with a turbine around here. Black Jesus keeps glittering me.
16. How many planets have you visited?
Who knows? Hundreds? Maybe over a thousand.
17. Do you use chapstick?
No… but R.T. does….
18. Can you use chopsticks?
Chop sticks, tines, gulfor forks, zagari eat-prods, Geminese finger hooks, and I know six kinds of Orrk’kin live-food wrassling.
19. Do you own a gun?
Several. And no you can’t see them.
20. Do you have any tattoos?
Yeah. It was a clan initiation thing.
21. Do looks matter?
Is this question for real? How would we see without them?
22. Do you like sushi?
It sure beats Orrk’kin live-food wrassling.
23. What was the most recent thing you bought?
It’s… it’s a flower made out of microfilaments and metal. I got it out of a vending machine. Do you think that’s stupid? It’s probably stupid.
24. Have you ever crawled through a window?
Why crawl when you can jump through swinging?
25. Are you emotional?
Yes. What of it? I mean, no. No! Wait… maybe. Now I’m sad.
26. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Confused.
27. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow?
Probably punch some stuff and be a dick about it. It’s what he does best.
28. Did you meet anybody new today?
Yeah, sure, lots of people. That pirate kid and his family, some bluebirds, a goblin, a washing machine… oh, and that fucking robot dick that sent us here.
29. Last time you cried?
I wasn’t crying! Something got in my eye!
30. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
Hate is a strong word. And yes.
31. The last person you held hands with?
I don’t know… my mom? When I was, like, five?
32. Ever been in love?
Nothing. What? Shut up.
33. Do you like yourself?
I dunno. Never thought about it. Now I’m thinking about it. Thanks for that. Dick quiz.
34. Do you like your life right now?
I hate your life right now. Stupid quiz with your stupid existential dread.
1. What is your name? Grebok, what’s yours?
2. What is your favorite color? So you’re just going to bowl right past my questions? I see how you are quiz.
3. What is your favorite time of the year? I’m not sure why I should have to answer your questions if you’re just going to ignore mine. But Spring. I like Spring. Birds, flowers, babies and crap.
4. What is your favorite animal? The ridge-backed Bruntlak.
5. What is your favorite sport to watch? Bruntlak ball.
6. What is your favorite smell? I’m starting to really like the smell of oil… because it’s manly.
7. Do you like your handwriting? Did my calligraphy teacher send you? Tell her you never saw me.
8. First thing you wash in the shower? I don’t understand the question.
9. Do you plan outfits? They used to be planned for me, but not anymore. Now I just wear whatever. Freedom. I wear freedom.
10. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Yes. A hundred times yes. Chuckles isn’t going to see this is he?
11. What’s the closest thing to you that’s red? Chuckles’ nose over there.
12. What’s the last dream you remember having? I… there was this bird, such a pretty bird, in a cage. A cage made of iron—that was also my college dorm, if that makes sense? My—the bird’s roommates were a hermit crab and a toaster oven. And all these nobles in fancy dress kept walking past the cage and asking where the toaster oven’s parents were. The bird kept singing and trying to get their attention but they only wanted to talk to the toaster oven. Then the hermit crab wasn’t there and we all just sort of understood he had died of a heroin overdose over winter break. Then my alarm went off. Why? What do you think that means?
13. What are you craving right now? Ham. Do you have any?
14. Do you like your hair? So that’s a no on the ham?
15. Is there anything sparkly in the room you’re in? Oh man, you have no idea. It’s like a swarm of pixie strippers lost a fight with a turbine around here.
16. How many planets have you visited? Who knows? Hundreds? Maybe over a thousand.
17. Do you use chapstick? No… but R.T. does….
18. Can you use chop sticks? Chop sticks, tines, gulfor forks, zagari eat-prods, Geminese finger hooks, and six kinds of Orrk’kin live food wrassling.
19. Do you own a gun? Several. And no you can’t see it.
20. Do you have any tattoos? Yeah. It was a Clan initiation thing.
21. Do looks matter? Is this question for real? How would I be able to see?
22. Do you like sushi? It sure beats Orrk’kin live food wrassling.
23. What was the most recent thing you bought? It’s… it’s a flower made out of microfilaments and metal. I got it out of a vending machine. Do you think that’s stupid? It’s probably stupid.
24. Have you ever crawled through a window? Why crawl when you can jump through swinging?
25. Are you emotional? Yeah! No. No! Wait… maybe. Now I’m sad.
26. How are you feeling RIGHT now? Confused.
27. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow? Probably punch some stuff and be a dick about it. It’s what he does best.
28. Did you meet anybody new today? Yeah, sure, lots of people. That pirate kid and his family, some bluebirds, a goblin, a washing machine… that fucking robot dick that sent us here.
29. Last time you cried? I wasn’t crying! Something got in my eye!
30. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people? Hate is a strong word. But yes.
31. The last person you held hands with? I don’t know… my mom? When I was, like, five?
32. Ever been in love? Nothing. What? Shut up.
33. Do you like yourself? I dunno. Never thought about it. Now I’m thinking about it. Thanks for that. Dick quiz.
34. Do you like your life right now? I hate your life right now. Stupid quiz with your stupid existential dread.
