Other Aliases: LC, the Avatar, Chuckles, the Smart One, Chuckleton Turnpike, Lord Chucklebruff of Avatarstonia
Planet of Origin: Moritania
Known Relatives: Mieta (mother, deceased); Lord Geoff (brother, believed dead); Oats McJunkett (”legal” guardian, fate unknown)
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Lord Chuckles’s troubles began the moment he was born.
He was brought into the Storyverse in a rush of blood and fluid on the planet Moritania–a real backwater, swords and sorcery kind of place, a place whose citizens spent most of their time waiting for prophecies (apparently written by more interesting people) to be fulfilled rather than, say, doing stuff.
One such prophecy, dictated by the Large Prophet Tem-Tem, spoke of a dark-haired hero with a strawberry birthmark who would be the living will of the gods and the hero of all Moritania. Eventually the day and the hour of the prophecy arrived and a goodly peasant woman gave unto the world her firstborn son: a flaxen-haired, fair skinned lad…
…sans birthmark.
This led to a considerable amount of embarrassment on the part of several high priests. Until, Lo! A dark twin followed on the heels of the first, wriggling free, birthmark and all. Face was saved, as was the proverbial day. In order to avoid any inconvenient questions, the firstborn was given to the midwife to discard. Taking pity on the mewling little peckerhead, she sneaked the child onto a passing garbage scow, the I.S.S. Unappealing (others might suggest this still equates to “throwing him away;” history will be the judge!).
Here under the watchful hand of Captain Oats “Sweaty” McJunkett, the boy was raised on a strict diet of table scraps and beer floaters. He honed the skills he would need to be a hero dodging canned goods thrown at him as part of the crew’s nightly sport: “Throw Cans at the Boy.”
It was the good Captain who named the boy Chuckles–named after the only thing the boy was worth, by the Captain’s estimation. Thus was the lot of the future Avatar of Good as he grew into a young man. It was on the eve of his 18th Birthday that the crew abandoned him on some… random, hillbilly planet.
As fate would have it, it was the same random, hillbilly planet upon which he was born.
Chuckles stumbled around his native land long enough to gather the impression that whoever ran the place was a real jerk. A real jerk who turned out to be his twin brother, the supposed Hero of Moritania, Lord Geoff. Inevitably, as these stories are wont to do, this one ended in sibling struggle and fratricide.
I would love to tell you that the people of Moritania held a big parade, learned a lesson about relying too heavily upon prophecy, and all lived happily ever after. I’d also like to remind the reader that one out of three isn’t bad (though really, the parade wasn’t all that big).
Having freed the land from the tyranny of his dark brother, Chuckles was knighted and asked to please be on his way. The reign of Lord Geoff had soured the populace on the idea of heroes hanging around the capital too long, lest they take over and start breaking things.
Chuckles—now, Lord Chuckles—wandered the land of his birth, felling foul giants, smiting the naughty, and bedding lusty maidens by the score. He was not, however, entirely satisfied with his life. Sure, the troll killing was fine sport, and lusty maidens were their own reward, but still something remained missing.
Then one day, fat with fortune, a single slip of paper found its way to him. A prize, he thought, for slaying the mighty swamp ogre of Mineas Brae (sometimes these guys just dropped treasure out of nowhere!).
The paper read: “Redeemable for One Free Sundae, courtesy of the Cosmic Paisley Wormhole McHappy’s.”
That sounded a heckadang bit better than what he was getting around here, he mused. Lord Chuckles promptly went about finding an untarnished cedar grove and a 33rd-level Druid to begin his adventures off-world.
As a Shadowstory.
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The beautiful piece of art up yonder (detailing our lunatic heroes) has been provided by the genius pens and pencils of the ever-brilliant James J. Frazier, and the colors given to us by the equibrilliant Andrew Conti. We did a little Photoshop tomfoolery to highlight the highlighted hero.
